The Expendables 2

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Sometimes you just want to step into a theater, munch on your popcorn, slurp your soda, and simply unplug. Forget the convoluted plots and perpetual layers of dream. Forget the twists and turns. Sometimes you just want to leave your brain at the door and view gratuitous action– at least I do. I found the perfect remedy for thinking with the second installment of “The Expendables”, the aptly titled “The Expendables2.”

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Governate This!

The intensity of his workout routine is paralleled only by the epic nature of his accent. After kicking Hollywood’s ass for over 30 years, he decided to put politics in a chokehold. He has more one-liners in his extensive repertoire than striations in his deified pecs—well, in his Mr. Olympia days at least.  He boasts a respectable body count total of 547. His drinking game has also left a wake of bodies. Listening to him attempt to pronounce the name of the state that he govenated still makes me giggle (Cowly-foa-knee-uh). His 65-year-old body would leave Adonis searching for the nearest shirt to cover up in. At times, the most interesting man in the world drinks Dos Arnies. The man, the myth, the legend, this week’s action star spotlight is on Arnold Schwarzenegger. Here’s a montage of classic Arnold quotes to honor him.

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Jack Reacher (Cruise actually can kick ass)

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            When you think of adrenaline inducing shoot em’ ups or testosterone pumping action flicks, you don’t necessarily place Tom Cruise into the mix– that niche seems to be reserved for the Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson’s and Jason “I have an awesome, gritty British accent” Statham’s of the world. Nowadays, when you hear Tom Cruise, you may think of his “Top Gun” or “Jerry Maguire” days, or even his manically-jumping-on-Oprah’s-couch-in-front-of-millions days, but “Jack Reacher” tries to punch those memories to the back of your head– and rather effectively. While fans of the book series may have preferred someone more rugged and, well, bigger, Cruise proves his detractors wrong and leaves few asses left unkicked.

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